Saṅkalpa KalpaDrumaḥ
Wishing Under a Desire Tree
Viśvanāth Cakravarti Thākur
ŚrīŚrī RādhāMadanaGopālo Vijayate
He Vrindāvaneśvari! Oh Goddess of Vrindāban. He Bayojaladhe! Oh ocean of youthful splendour. He Rūpajaladhe! You are the limitless ocean of beauty. Oh ocean of wonderful qualities and sweet pastimes. Oh ocean of good fortune. You are an ocean of amorous amusement. Oh ocean of compassion. Please hear what I am about to submit to you. I wish to be your maidservant. By rendering service to you in the company of your lover, surrounded by the circle of your cowherd girl friends, I will make you happy. This is my only request. I want nothing other than this. 1
Having decorated your body with various ornaments, I will take you to make a tryst with your lover, whose face you refuse to look at, however, due to feelings inspired by your adverse, feminine, left-wing nature. I will then catch hold of the end of your cloth and forcibly bring you to Śrī Hari. If you become angry with me and scold me because of this, I will undoubtedly be transported to the limits of ecstasy, seeing this mood of yours to be like a shower of nectar. 2
Externally though, I will then fall at your feet in submission, seeing that you have become angry with me. But at the same time, unbeknown to you, I will signal to your paramour from the corners of my eyes that he should now seize this opportunity to quickly embrace you with his two massive arms. I will then accomplish the highest perfection of my eyes by gazing at you, being held in that embrace with your bodily hairs standing on end like a coat of mail, the purported purpose of which is to afford protection, but that nevertheless causes your body to thrill with such rapture that you fall even further into the depths of that embrace. 3
Śrī Kṛṣṇa catches hold of your hand and says to you, “He PrāṇaPriye! Please adorn this flower bed with your mystifying presence.” The sound of those words that resemble the honey-soaked pollen of a flower, I will drink through my ears while you, your voice choked with emotion, reply to him, “He Mādhava! I am a chaste girl! Please let me go!” When I hear these words of yours I will come to your rescue, taking Śrī Kṛṣṇa to task by reprimanding him severely. 4
When Śrī Kṛṣṇa again intercepts you (whose nature is so contrary) on his chest with his two powerful arms, then your body will become moistened with the tears of your ecstasy. Repeatedly you try to rise up, which causes the locks of your hair to become disarranged and your braids loosened. The perfection of my birth will then be accomplished by seeing you in this sweet state of affairs. 5
After I have spent some time in entertaining you with various expressions of the fine arts, you finally take your seat on that bed made of flowers. Though you at first resist by saying, “No! No! No!” Śrī Kṛṣṇa, who is very accomplished at wanton play, then indulges in various pastimes of enjoyment with you while experiencing the greatest happiness. I will then perfect my eyes by placing them at an interstice amongst the foliage and so drink the nectar of that scene. 6
While you are both distracted in your pastimes of amorous dalliance, I will sit outside and pull on the rope fitted to a fan within the kuñja, thus creating a gentle breeze to give relief to you, whose bodies are now decorated by beads of perspiration produced from the labour of love’s play. When I hear the cooing sounds that you are both making, a gentle smile will blossom forth from my face. 7
Then Rūpa Mañjarī and the other mañjarīs will tell me, “Now you can leave the fan and go to pick flowers, grind the sandalwood paste and other such services.” I will immediately accept this order on my head without feeling the least bit discontented that I have had to leave the happiness of seeing the most cherished pastimes of that moment. In order to properly execute my prescribed services, I must necessarily become the object of the mercy of Tulasī Mañjarī. In this way I will serve you in the happiness of love. 8
I will string flower garlands and clean your necklaces and other ornaments. I will also make small paintbrushes with which to fashion various (tilaka) pictures like the horned shark (Capricorn) and others. I will also prepare camphor, saffron, sandalwood and aloewood (aguru) paste for anointing your fair and dark forms. Then along with the other sakhīs I will sit down to prepare very tastefully designed packets of pān with cloves and betel nuts. 9
Having engaged in intense battle under the direction of the forces of Kandarpa (Cupid), your clothes and ornaments have all become disarrayed. I will then ready myself to dress and decorate you again. Simply by the glance of Śrī Rūpa Mañjarī and the other sakhīs I will know to bring the garlands and other paraphernalia before you. 10
He Vrindāvaneśvari! Oh Goddess of Vrindāban! When Śrī Kṛṣṇa again gazes upon you after I have adorned your graceful body from head to toe and so comes forward yearning to touch you, I will take him to task while exhibiting my false anger, my head thrown back and my eyebrows contracted in a formidable frown, all the while challenging him with loud shouts. 11
Śrī Lalitā Devī, who has just arrived, comes forward to joke with you, expecting to find you both in a disheveled state after your amorous frolicking. When, however, she sees that you are dressed quite nicely, not realizing that this has been accomplished by the skillful arts of Śrī Rūpa Mañjarī and the other sakhīs, she is astonished, thinking that you must not have enjoyed together. At this time Śrī Kṛṣṇa addresses her, “He Lalite! I came here to extract the thorn of Śrī Rādhikā’s chastity, but why has this mischievous maiden of yours prevented me from doing so?” Taking these words of Śrī Kṛṣṇa to be just like the sweetest honey, the black bee of my heart relishes this sweet nectar. 12
Then when you come out of the kuñja, your body enveloped by the left arm of Śrī Śyāmsundar, joking and listening to stories told by the other sakhīs, your bright and cheerful faces shining forth with gaiety, all on your way to wander about in the forest groves, I will then wave my hands while running to catch up with you (lest I be forgotten and left behind). 13
He Svāminī! Oh my mistress! I will sing songs of my own composition in glorification of your wonderful characteristics and qualities while I spread a cover of flowers along the path you will traverse to make it sweet- scented and soft to the touch of your lotus feet. Along with the other sakhīs, I will continuously cause, by throwing them into the air, a rain of flower petals to fall in every direction with your every step. 14
Oh Goddess of Vrindāban! Your Dearest One picks some flowers to fashion ear ornaments, necklaces, armlets, a girdle and a tiara with which he will then decorate you, while I busy myself in decorating you with the flowers of my poetry. In other words I will then describe (in song) how he has so beautifully decorated you. 15
The bees, who are attracted by the fragrance of the Kadamba trees, have now arrived to chant your glories, while the moonbeams dance on the surface of the Yamunā, making its waves glisten. You will then began your Rāsa dance with Śrī Hari while I play upon the vīna, in whose expertise I have become very renowned, after taking lessons at your lotus feet. 16
He Rādhe! When you have finished your Rāsa dance and are now ready to lie down to rest within a kuñja of new Mālatī flowers with Kṛṣṇa and the other sakhīs, I will bring juicy fruits like pomegranates, mangoes and bananas to distribute to all of you. 17
He Rādhe! I will then cause you to lie down in great ecstatic happiness with your Priyatam (Dearmost) on a very luxuriant bed of lotuses prepared by Tulasī Devī, and which is adequate for Cupid’s dalliance. When I have you in cheerful spirits, I will then offer tāmbūl (pān & betel) for you to chew. 18
He Vrindāvaneśvari! Oh Goddess of Vrindāban! I will then massage your two lotus feet, the fragrance of which causes me to be carried away by the currents of an ocean of wonder and charm. With my two eyes I will retain their form within my mind. I will cause your lotus feet to be embraced by my two breasts and when no one is looking I will kiss them. 19
He Rādhe! At the end of the night, when I see that the long curly locks of hair of your Dearmost have become tangled with your necklace and the ornament which hangs from your nose, then I will go and wake up the param priya sakhīs and bring them here to show them this wonderful scene. 20
By showing the sakhīs this splendid sight I will plunge them into an ocean of ecstatic happiness. In this way I will obtain immense quantities of their mercy. I adore you who wake with a start when your deep sleep is broken by the sound of the sakhīs’ ankle bells. 21
He Svāminī! Oh Goddess! Oh my mistress! Feeling somewhat ashamed and bashful to see the sakhīs there, you try to get up but are unable to do so due to the fact that your necklace and earrings are all tangled up in the hair of your lover. Unable to disentangle yourself on your own I will then very sagaciously and expediently release you from this embarrassing situation by exhibiting the dexterity of my fingers in quickly untangling you from the long tresses of Śrī Śyāmsundar. 22
He Svāminī! By removing the earrings from your ears and the ornament from your nose they will of themselves become disentangled. He Devī! Considering each and every pore of your transcendental body to be of infinite importance, worth more than 100 million of my own existences, I will be very attentive not to cause you any pain while doing this. 23
He Svāminī! As you proceed on a solitary path back to your house in the company of your cowherd girl friends, I will stealthily return to surreptitiously observe the activities of Śrī Kṛṣṇa as he tries to beseech Candrāvalī in his favour again, after she has become offended by his infidelity to her. These details I will then narrate before the assembly of the cowherd girls. 24
With sweetly scented water I will wash your face. With twigs of the mango tree I will cleanse your teeth. With a delicate golden reed I will cleanse your tongue. After performing these services I will then bring a mirror to show you. 25
Thereafter I will dress you in very attractive garments and arrange your hair with a golden comb. I will braid your hair with jewels and place small flowers in the centre of the braids. 28
He Rādhe! In great delight I will decorate your forehead with tilaka designs and a pearl ornament and then place a diadem on your head. He Devī! I will decorate your eyes with kajjal (collyrium), your ears with earrings and your nose with a pearl. 29
He Rādhe! I will decorate your cheeks with tilak pictures of the Capricorn, your chin with a dot of musk, your breasts with various kinds of pictures, your two arms with bracelets and armlets and on your head I will place a beautiful ornament encrusted with blue sapphires. 30
On your fingers I will place jeweled rings, on your chest a jeweled locket and a lovely blouse embroidered with pearls will adorn your two breasts. Finally I will worship you by placing around your neck variously coloured flower garlands. 31
Around your lovely hips I will place jeweled ornaments; around the ankles of your two lotus feet, ankle bracelets and bells; and the toes of those lotus feet I will decorate with rings that make a sweet jingling sound. He Devī! Even though the soles of your two lotus feet are naturally tinged with a rose-coloured hue, I will dye them with lac dye which has obviously amassed heaps of religious merit (in that it has come to rest at the most auspicious place in all the worlds). 32
He Devī! Though your transcendental body is naturally very fragrantly scented still I will smear newly ground saffron all over your limbs to perfume them. I will place a blue lotus flower in your hand for you to play with and then I will bring a jeweled mirror that you might see yourself. 33
Seeing your own wonderful beauty you feel that it might present an alluring temptation before the bee-like eyes of your lover and this makes your body very restless. With every particle of my mind, heart and soul I will now offer ārati to you with a camphor lamp and the water falling from my eyes. 34
He Devī! When Kundalatā arrives at your house, having been sent by Mother Yaśoda to bring you to prepare Kṛṣṇa’s morning repast (breakfast), and you thus set off with her and the other sakhīs to go to Mother Yaśoda’s house, I will run behind carrying your container of tāmbūl (pān), a jeweled fan and other such articles. 35
Arriving at the Queen of the cowherd’s house, you will attain all well-being by bowing down at her feet as she comes out of the house to greet you by smelling your head. After you have first had darshan of her transcendental body, veiled with shyness and moistened by the tears from her eyes, I will also bow down to offer her my obeisances with devotion. 36
(She addresses you) “Lo! Barāṅgi! (who are so beautiful and whose body is so excellently proportioned). Sundari! (Beautiful girl) Rādhe! You are the personified form of penance, austerities and divine contemplation, the crest jewel of the house of Vṛṣabhānu. In my house also you are the personification of good fortune in that you have received a benediction from Durvāsā Muni that whatever you cook is like nectar. Thus you are the cause of the good health of my son and his complete freedom from the attack of any disease.” These words of Mother Yaśoda addressed to you, give me such infinite satisfaction that a broad smile must necessarily appear on my face. 37
He Svāminī! By the restless movement of your eyes I can understand that you are very desirous to see your dearest who is at this moment being anointed with various unguents and colognes before his bath. By some artifice I will then bring you to a vantage point from which you can get a glimpse of him. 38
After washing and drying your feet I will then remove some of your jeweled necklaces and flower garlands which might get in the way while you’re cooking. At this time, having become very delighted with me for my stratagem which enabled you to get a glimpse of Śrī Kṛṣṇa, you will say, “He Kiṅkarī (My devoted maidservant) These ornaments are for you. You please keep them for yourself.” These words of yours are such a source of elation for me that at that time I appear as a Mādhavī flower in the full bloom of Springtime. 39
After you have completed cooking a variety of the four kinds of foodstuffs, such as sweet rice, spinach, soup and fried things, all of which far surpass the taste of nectar, the Queen of the cowherds, Mother Yaśoda, directs you to serve the prasādam. To this you reply, “Na! Na!” (No! No!) again and again. This sight I will relish with great satisfaction. (Out of shyness, Rādhārāṇī is reluctant to serve the prasādam to Kṛṣṇa and his cowherd boy friends). 40
He Vrindāvaneśvari! Oh Queen of Vrindāban! To see your Dearmost satisfied by eating the preparations you have cooked for him immediately transports you to the furthest reaches of exultation, as your eyes, peeping through the lattice work of the veranda, drink the lustrous beauty of your lover’s body. I will then completely immerse my mind in the waves of splendiferous brilliance that shine forth from your rapturous face, begotten by the ecstasy attendant upon the attack of Cupid’s arrows. 41
“He Rādhe! He Putri! (Oh my daughter!) He Maṅgala Svarūpe! (Oh personified Form of auspiciousness!) This is your house. Do I see any difference between you and my son?” I will eternally relish in my heart the gentle smile that comes to your lips upon hearing these words of the Queen of Vraja (Mother Yaśoda). 42
Thereafter, when Śrī Kṛṣṇa goes out to the forest in the company of his cowherd boy friends, followed by his father and other elders crying tears of fear at the impending separation from their Darling, you remain watching the graceful loveliness of your lover until he is out of sight. You then proceed to your guru’s residence. I will accompany you (to serve you) as you proceed from there to the forest, under the pretext of going to worship the SunGod. 43
Once in the forest, after you have caught sight of your Paramour, you begin to pick flowers while I stand beside you with a flower basket made of leaves. When Śrī Kṛṣṇa accosts us with some of his scathing remarks, “Who is this thief!?” [cauri- ‘thief’, (heart) captivator; affectionate address], I will reply, “No one!” My only wish is to be able to remember you as you offer your eyes to Śrī Kṛṣṇa at this moment. 44
“He Cauri! Let me see how many flowers you have stolen. Come on show me!” When Kṛṣṇa speaks to me in this way I will hide the flower basket behind me. Seeing this, he comes and forcibly grabs hold of my arm, which causes me pain. 45
“Lo Devī! I am your maidservant. Please save me! “Feeling very distressed, I thus call out to you, my voice trembling with anxiety, praying that you give me shelter. In answer to this you accost Śrī Kṛṣṇa with these words, “Hey you cunning knave. Why are you giving grief to my friend?” Then you come and catch hold of Kṛṣṇa’s arm at which point I am freed and so take shelter of you. 46
Having released me, Śrī Kṛṣṇa now turns his attention to you, by first tearing the kañculikā (bodice) on your chest and then forcibly taking the flower garland from your neck and placing it around his own neck, while berating you with taunting words, “Aho! Cauri! Are all these flowers of mine just for your flower garlands? If so, I will be forced to punish this beautiful neck of yours by clasping it tightly.” 47
“My cunning friend! Come with me to a cave where one king resides. By his order you will be disrobed and after seeing you in this fashion he will be so delighted with me that he will present me with a garland of pearls to adorn my forehead.” [The meaning of this is that KāmDev (Cupid) is residing in a nearby cave and by his influence, beads of perspiration will appear on Śrīmatī Rādhārāṅī’s forehead while exerting herself in the labour of love’s play. This is the import of her joking words.] 48
“Though you are the son of Mahārāj Nanda, by serving that wicked king (Cupid) your intelligence has become inconsistent and of a contrary nature. This is not your fault. It is the fault of association with that mischievous king. But I do not know if Providence has actually caused such a fate to be written on the forehead of a chaste girl like me.” 49
He Devī! In a state of excessive ecstasy I will cause my ears to drink the nectar of these eloquent words filled with insinuations and innuendoes. I thus become completely inebriated by ecstatic mellows while causing my two eyes to drink the nectar of this wanton dalliance with your lover, Śrī Kṛṣṇa. 50
He Devī! When on the banks of your favourite bathing place (RādhāKuṇḍ), you sit with your Dearmost on a swing, beautifully decorated with varieties of fresh flowers, I will swing you, scatter the pollen of fragrant flowers upon you, sing songs and play the vīna to entertain you. 51
He Devī! When you are seated with your lover on a siṁhāsan at the base of a desire tree in YogaPīṭh, I will come to worship you with offerings of pādya (footwash), arghya (auspicious substances thrown on the head), camphor lamps, flower garlands, ornaments and varieties of foodstuffs (those which are licked, drunk, sucked and chewed). 52
He Rādhe! When you go out in the Springtime to the forests of Govardhan to conquer your lover in battle during the Holi festival,* accompanied by hundreds and hundreds of your handmaidens and confidants, who have now accepted the position of soldiers, their natural shyness and modesty having been completely put to flight by the prospects of such a battle, I will supply you with numerous flasks of freshly ground kuṅkum (saffron) powder. 53
[*when coloured dyes are thrown about amidst great tumult and hubbub]
At this time, Śrī Kṛṣṇa challenges you with the following words, “Baring my chest I have come before you and will remain standing here. If you are strong enough you may now hurl those (wooden) balls at my chest. And if in your heart you find any real heroism or valour then open your blouse and stand your ground before me.” 54
In answer you reply, “He Kṛṣṇa! This is your nature to be overly conceited. We heard from Paurṇamāsī that in your previous life you were Ajita (unconquerable), but this must be false, since my handmaidens have already defeated you many times. 55
My hairs will be standing on end as I listen to this exchange of rough language between you, mutual taunting tooth and nail that resembles a mixture of the sounds of bracelets jingling and clanking together accompanied by the beating of a kettledrum. I will then sing hymns to praise and eulogize this disputatious wrangling of yours. 56
After such strenuous fighting, as you lie down with the Lord of your life to take rest within one of the vales of Govardhan Hill, surrounded on all sides by hundreds and hundreds of sakhīs, I will place before you bowls of honey brought by some forest Goddess. 57
Having drunk this honey to your full satisfaction your speech now becomes somewhat slurred, as you remark, “Hai! Wh-Wh-Why is the earth spi-spinning? The tr-trees are ru-ru-running in fear! I-I’m af-af-afffraid! The sky’s g-g-going to f-fall on m-m-my headddd! HHHHow will I ssssstaaaaaaay alive?!!” Carrying on in this fashion you catch hold of the neck of your Dearmost who then turns to me and says, “Your mistress Rādhikā is speaking incoherently but I will make her well. Just see. Don’t go away from here.” The liquid nectar of these words fills my heart with wonder as I withdraw from there, only to fix my eyes in the spaces between the creepers so that I can continue to watch your amorous play. 58-59
Later, when you are playing together in the water and Kṛṣṇa’s nose, ears, eyes and mouth become filled with water, having thus been defeated by you while splashing each other in the pond, he suddenly goes under the water and, playing like an alligator, what he does then I can understand by watching the expression on your lotus face. 60
With Kṛṣṇa and the other sakhīs I will massage your body with oil and then bathe you with scented water. Then I will dress you with new clothes and various ornaments. After feeding you with pomegranates and other fruit I will bring you into a jeweled temple and lay you down on a bed of flowers. 61
He Rādhe! In order to enjoy some fun with your paramour, you stealthily get up and go to hide in Vāṇī’s kuñja. When Śrī Kṛṣṇa comes out to look for you, I will jokingly say to him, “He Kṛṣṇa! Devī Rādhikā is hiding in Vāṇī’s kuñja; why are you looking elsewhere?” Knowing me to be your dear follower and partial to you, Kṛṣṇa disbelieves my words of truth and continues to look elsewhere for you. In this way I will cause you to experience great joy. 62
Then I will say to you, “He Svāminī! Hari is hiding within the KadambaKuñja, therefore why are you looking elsewhere?” By believing my words, victory is bestowed upon you when you find Śrī Kṛṣṇa there. 63
Thereafter, when you are playing at dice with Śrī Kṛṣṇa, he beseeches you as follows, “He Rādhe! You don’t like to give or accept kisses as wagers to be paid or received when victorious or defeated in this game, but those who are connoisseurs of playing dice speak of no better wagers than kisses, hugs and drinking the nectar of each other’s lips. 64
To this you reply, “There is a virgin maiden of the name Bhringī living here in Govardhan who is a member of the Pulinda (aboriginal) race. She is very expert and experienced in these affairs and can therefore accept and bestow on my behalf embraces and whatever else you like. 65
Then you turn to me and say, “Go.” I quickly go to bring Bhringī who returns with me and sits down in front of Mukunda. In this way I will cause the sweet-faced sakhīs to laugh by showing them Kṛṣṇa’s face blushed with embarrassment. 66
Thereafter Śrī Kṛṣṇa ceases to pursue the laying up of kisses as stakes in betting and instead decides to place his flute as a wager. After having lost his flute in the bet, when his very morose and dejected face is seen by the gopīs they jokingly address Him, “Hai! Hai! (Oh my!) Here in Vrindāban this one flute you had to call your own, but you weren’t able to retain this wife of yours. This lascivious debauch, though she was attached to drinking the nectar of your lips has now gone off to search out the company of someone else. What a surprising affair!” 67
Śrī Kṛṣṇa replies, “Overcome by hatred and malice towards my chaste, virtuous, qualified, fortunate and pleasing flute – because you are not able to achieve even a measure of equality with this flute of mine – you have now confined it somewhere. Therefore I am forced to bind you in my arms and carry you off to some mountain cave. 68
Seeing Kṛṣṇa approaching you, I will very quickly and stealthily take the flute from underneath your arm and hide it somewhere else. Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s hands, on the pretext of searching for his flute begin to wander all over your body and a battle instigated by Cupid soon ensues. My only desire is to see your face elated with ecstasy while engaged in this battle. 69
Jaṭilā, who has arrived now to see that the worship of the SunGod is being carried out properly, addresses Śrī Kṛṣṇa, who has dressed himself as a brāhmaṇa, come to perform the pūjā, “He Brāhmaṇ! Please bestow your mercy upon my daughter-in-law. She, who is herself as radiant as the sun, desires very much that you, who are obviously very high-spirited and lustrously brilliant (also like the sun) should accept the position of her priest for the performance of this SūryaPūjā.” Having made this request she induces you to offer your obeisances to that brāhmaṇa (who is really Kṛṣṇa) and in this way hands you over to be taken charge of by him. I worship you whose face has broken into an uncontrollable smile as a result of this favourable turn of events. 70
While returning home, having been instructed by your guru to do so, I will follow behind you only to see your anxious condition due to an unquenchable thirst to see your lover, as you turn your head repeatedly to gaze upon his form while calling to me, “Oh Kiṅkarī, come on!” 71
Since you are feeling terribly afflicted by the pangs of separation, when you return home in the afternoon I will lay you down on a bed of freshly picked flowers. Within a very short time, however, you experience those flowers to be like a bed of smouldering embers. Then I will move you to another bed made with the stems of lotus flowers and besmeared with camphor and sandalwood paste. 72
He Rādhe! When Candankalā comes from Mother Yaśoda with the request that you please prepare something for your Dearmost to eat before he takes rest, you become very excited. In the company of your handmaidens you decide to prepare various kinds of sugarplums (laḍḍus) such as nava karpūrkeli. I will then go into the kitchen and wipe down the hearth, put the cooking vessel on the stove, light the lamp and bring water, ghee, raw sugar, bananas, black pepper, camphor, coconut and wheat flour. 73-74
While you are cooking I will enjoy some joking words with you by saying, “The burning fire of separation which could not be quenched even by sprinkling you with sandalwood paste, has now become extinguished instead by the fire over which you are preparing this karpūrkeli.” 75
Calling loudly, “Hambā! Hambā!” Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s cows return from the pasturing grounds in the afternoon, the dust from their hooves blanketing everything in all the ten directions. At this time I will run to tell you, causing you to drink the honey-like nectar of this happy news. Overwhelmed with joy, you get up from the low wooden seat on which you were seated while cooking these various preparations. The other sakhīs and I will then ready you so that you might make a tryst with your lover. 76
After having hidden you in the creepers by the side of the path that Kṛṣṇa will traverse, I will go watch for his approach. Just to extinguish the agonizing fire of separation in which you are burning, I call out to you that Kṛṣṇa is coming, “He Īśvarī!” But this causes you to become angry with me that I might have given away your hiding place. 77
I will first cause the bee-like eyes of Kṛṣṇa to relish your lotus-like face. Your two thirsty eyes like Cakora birds will then be bathed in the ambrosial rays emanating from hissmiling, moon-like face, thus restoring your life fully. In this way I will completely submerse you in the sweet and graceful, gentle beauty of Śrī Kṛṣṇa. 78
I will take great delight in seeing how you have both become motionless; paralysed by the captivating sight of each other. Having been ordered by Lalitā Devī to do so, I will then have to bring you home. Thereafter, in the company of the sakhīs we will go before the Queen of the cowherds, Mother Yaśoda, to show her the karpūrkeli and amṛtakeli that has been prepared by you. 79
Arriving at Mother Yaśoda’s in the evening, she inquires from me about your welfare. To this I reply that everything is well with you as you are always attended by all good fortune, prosperity and auspiciousness. By showing her the rows and rows of laḍḍus prepared by you, I will induce the other sakhīs to hear your glories from the mouth of Mother Yaśoda as she continues to praise you. 80
Seeing that her son is returning from the pastures with the cows, the Queen of Vraja is totally immersed in waves of awe brought about by longing expectation. With the milk from her breasts and the tears of love from her eyes she bathes his body while instructing the maidservants and myself as well to prepare various unguents with which to anoint his transcendental body. At this time I will sing to myself the praises of the Queen of Vraja. 81
After Śrī Kṛṣṇa, in the company of his companions, has been duly bathed by Mother Yaśoda, dressed, decorated with various ornaments and fed with various preparations of foodstuffs and drinks, I will then stealthily accept the remnants of his meal, unseen by any other. 82
He Devī! As a medicine to counteract the effects of the fever in which you are burning, generated by the fire of separation from your lover, I will administer unto you the remnants of Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s prasādam and as well narrate to you the details of how he took his bath and repast. In this way I will cool down your tongue, ears and heart which were suffering from the fire of that fever. 83
In the summer, just before sunset, when Kṛṣṇa is taking bath within PāvanSarovar, even though surrounded by his cowherd boyfriends, he dips underneath the water and swims to the ghāṭ where you are bathing to embrace you. Then he stealthily makes his way back underneath the water to where his friends are and surfaces there. 84
Though they are just nearby, your mother-in-law, sister-in- law and her husband, as well as Kṛṣṇa’s own brothers and sisters are completely unaware that Kṛṣṇa has embraced you in this way. But myself, having become extremely delighted to know this, will then, in the company of the other sakhīs, narrate the details of Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s dexterity and cleverness before Śrīmatī LalitāDevī. 85
Thereafter, I will delight in seeing you drown yourself in waves of ecstasy from the ocean of happiness by taking you up into the room above the garden (Candraśālikā— from where the rays of the moon are enjoyed) so that you, with your eyes glued to the window there, can watch your Dearmost as he milks the Surabhi cows. 86
He Devī! After the Queen of the Cowherds, Mother Yaśoda, has affectionately fed her darling and made him lie down to take rest, I will come before him to secretly submit to him the news of your distressful condition. Having been informed by him that he will meet you at Saṅket kuñja, I will return to you to apprise you of his situation – a similar state of anxious and eager impatience. 87
Finally, after having dressed and decorated you accordingly (in black garments during the period of the waning moon and in white garments during the period of the waxing moon), I will bring you into the bowers amongst the forest of desire trees where you can sport with your lover in the ocean of Cupid’s amusements. 88
“O most compassionate one, O Goddess of Auspiciousness! Oh He Tulasī! (Śrī RādhāRamaṇ Cakravarti) By placing your lotus feet on my head and by my drinking a little of the water that has washed those lotus feet, these desires to render service in the aforementioned ways have arisen in my heart.” 89
“Where am I? whose mind is a maze of hundreds and hundreds of deceitful and insincere persuasions; and where are these very dear yet rarely attainable desires which have suddenly sprung up within my being? [They are light years apart.] Still, your causeless mercy is the only refuge for such a one as me, with no other resort or destination. Only because you have not counted my offenses am I able to conceive of such desires.” 90
“Oh He Raṅga Mañjarī! (Śrī KṛṣṇaCaran Cakravarti) Please extend your favour unto me. He Prema Mañjarī! (Śrī GaṅgāNārāyan Cakravarti) Please cast your merciful glance in my direction. Oh He Vilās Mañjarī! (Śrī Narottam Ṭhākur Mahāśay) Please make me fit to receive the treasure of your two lotus feet and allow me to be counted amongst the servants and handmaidens of the sakhīs.” 91
“He Mañjulālī! (Śrī Lokanāth Gosvāmī) In your perpetual service at the lotus feet of the Goddess of your life, you have become the very form of matchless prosperity. Please be kind upon me. He Guṇa Mañjarī! (Śrī GopālBhaṭṭa Gosvāmī) I offer my prostrated obeisances to you. Please bestow your mercy on me. He Ras Mañjarī! (Śrī RaghunāthBhaṭṭa Gosvāmī) Please deliver me.” 92
“He Bhānumati! (Śrī Raghunāth dās Gosvāmī) You are unequaled in your absorption in the ocean of love for the Controller (Śrīmatī Rādhikā) of the Supreme Controller. Please bless me that I may be situated in my proper station (true designation). He Lavaṅga Mañjarī! (Śrī Sanātan Gosvāmī) You have been carried away by a strong current of love. Please just once bestow your merciful glance upon me, considering me as your own.” 93
“He Rūpa Mañjarī! (Śrī Rūpa Gosvāmī) You whose feelings and emotions are ever immersed within the mellows of the artistic expressions of Rādhā and Kṛṣṇa’s love dalliance. As a result of your merciful glance, I have conceived of rendering such service as this. May this object of mine be fulfilled by the expression of your abundant compassion and mercy.” 94
“He Deva! He NandaNandan! As a result of remaining continuously in the embrace of Śrī Rādhā, your transcendental body has now taken on a golden complexion. Also your heart and mind, while remaining always in contemplation of Śrī Rādhikā, have now become the personification of mercy. Thus are you now known as GauraDayānidhi. Please bless me that the creeper of my aforementioned intentions will bear fruit.” 95
By the kindness of Śrī Lalitā Devī, Śrīmati Rādhārāṇī obtains Śrī Giridhāri. This is certainly very well known in Vrindāban. Having heard this news, I beseech you! “He Lalite! I have taken shelter of your lotus feet. Please bestow your merciful glance upon me.” 96
Amongst the assembly of the young damsels of Vrindāban who have such beautiful eyes, like those of the does of the forest, you are very similar to Śrīmati Rādhikā in terms of physical appearance, qualities, virtues, nature, age and name, and are therefore the embodiment of causeless mercy. “Oh Viśākhā! Without acknowledging my hundreds and hundreds of offenses, please accept me.“ 97
“He Priyasakhāgan! Oh you who are the proprietors of an immense wealth of love for Kṛṣṇa and who are dearer than life itself to those in the blossom of new youth. Oh PriyaNarmaSakhās! (The cowherd boys who assist in Kṛṣṇa’s conjugal affairs.) By directly bathing in the dust of your lotus feet may my head be crowned with success.” 98
“Oh you who are the form of the mukut (crown) of Vrindāban; you who are worshipful by the residents of Vraja. He Govardhan! Oh spiritual master of immovable mountains. By residing near you, though my heart is as hard as stone, still the creeper of these transcendental desires has suddenly sprung up like a flowering vine, drenched by a fresh spring shower.” 99
“Oh you who are comparable to Śrīmati Rādhikā herself. I will reside on your banks and worship you at the proper times. Oh RādhāKuṇḍa! By drinking your waters may my hopes and aspirations in the form of a creeper be nourished and bear fruits and flowers.” 100
“Oh YogaPīṭh! You are the altar where is situated the siṁhāsan on which the DivineCouple are seated together, surrounded by so many desire trees. You have caused me to come to reside here in this place which is fully under your control, therefore, may this purpose of mine, having taken shelter at your feet, become swiftly successful. 101
“Oh you who are esteemed by all animate and inanimate objects in Vrindāban (as she who nourishes and protects them). He Śrī Vrinde! Your intimate relationship with the Great Gallant and his Consort has possessed you of an inestimable wealth of great fortune. Therefore please bless me that I may be counted amongst the attendants of Śrī Rādhā. 102
“Oh Sovereign ruler of Vrindāban. All glories to the moon and to he whose crown bears the moon as a diadem. Oh you who are worshipful by Sanātan, Sanandan and Nārad. He Gopeśvar! May you be victorious! Please bestow on me unconditional love for the lotus feet of the DivineCouple who enjoy their pleasure pastimes within the forests of Vraja. I offer my salutations to you.” 103
“All of you! the faculties of my mind, my feelings and emotions– please engage yourselves in the solitary worship of Śrī Vrindāban. If you are not able to relish the taste from the ocean of Rādhā and Kṛṣṇa’s pleasure pastimes in Vrindāban, but at the same time cannot free yourself from an intense greed to be able to relish such sweetness, then with full faith (or even without faith, but by some means or other) quickly take shelter of this desire tree of my aspirations.” 104
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